I’ve never experienced a runner’s high. I’m not entirely sure what that would even feel like.
I’ve been running off and on for the past 20 years, but it’s been a regular occurrence in the past year as I needed to make a few drastic lifestyle changes. Plus, I’m training for a marathon.
But that training has changed things. Before, I would lace up my shoes most days of the week, run around four miles, and call it a day. There was no expectation beyond this being good for me. But I was in the best shape I had been in since my 20s, and it felt like if I was ever going to attempt running 26 fucking miles—for fun—it was now or never. Of course, I knew the training would be hard. But we all know what they say about hindsight. The more miles I logged, particularly as I got into the double digits for my Sunday long runs, it started to gnaw at me. When would I stop feeling those ever-compounding minor aches and pains? Where’s the euphoria or the joy? When would I start losing myself in the miles or go farther and faster based solely on vibes?
